Detox Day 1

Ouch. My head hurts.

The day started off pretty good actually, I didn't get hungry until late tonight. I ate very lightly - only natural foods, no coffee, no chocolate, 3 serves of fruit, nuts and sultanas for a snack, salad and an egg for lunch, an egg and some wholemeal crackers for dinner. I think that's about a third of what I'd normally eat. I took the detox powder, which is similar to a fibre supplement at breakfast and dinner and managed to keep it down. It's not delicious, as the people in the reviews claim - if they think it's delish, I have to wonder what else they are eating.

My mood was good, not cranky at all. In fact, I was probably a bit more gentle today with the kids because I was expecting to be cranky. I did feel tired towards the evening and opted not to cook, instead asking ex to get something for him and the kids for dinner. It smelled really nice, but I was strong and didn't indulge. My friend lived this way for about 4 or 5 months, while she lost weight on the Cohen's diet - no carbs, fat, sugar or dairy - only protein, fruit and veg. I don't know how she did it -and yes, she lost about 20 kilos.

I really want to see what happens to the allergy on my hands after I've detoxed. I'm hoping it will just gradually disappear, but we'll see. I only have this allergy here, in Malaysia. My hands itch and prickle and then look like I've gone over them with a grater. Everyone here has their own cure, but so far nothing has helped stop the attacks - except a strong steroid cream my sis-in-law gave me that she gets from Thailand for the same problem. My doctor says it's probably the water. My own opinion is that it's the stress manifesting itself physically. I used to think I was allergic to dish detergent, but now it's any cleaner that can set it off and sometimes, even if I haven't been cleaning, I'll still have an attack. So, here's hoping.

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In other matters, ex's brother (the lawyer who lives locally) dropped by for a visit. He was actually picking up his youngest son who'd come over to our place to play with my kids. Ex doesn't talk to his brothers that much anymore. I guess they've tried to help him and it hasn't worked or ex has refused, so they've given up. The brother is a little worried about ex, saying that ex still had to find himself, find his niche in the world. He doesn't think having the office will help him but I get the sense that he doesn't really know what will. He talks a lot this guy. He's arrogant too and his son is even worse. They are not my favorite people but they are family and I know that if I got into any kind of trouble, I could call on him, so I'm always polite and try to listen to what he's saying.

Ex is enjoying his office. He's been there every day since he moved in and slept there on Saturday night after being called out for a drink and, having already taken xanax, found he was too out of it to drive home. I can't say anything, though I wish he'd be more careful. It's his life, his choice to make dumb decisions like that.

Anyway, my heads thumping, so I'm going to bed. Day 2 of detox coming up. I wonder if I'll be as strong as I was today.